The Spiritual Sunburn
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On my last day of Kindergarten, Mom drove past the school and saw me seated at the edge of the playground, alone.
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When I got home that day, I had a seizure.
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This was the first of many last-day-of-school illnesses. The pattern continued year after year like clockwork.
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It was only much later that I realized what was actually happening.
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As a highly sensitive kid living in a world that didn’t understand highly sensitive people, I was taught to soldier through no matter what.
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I’d bowl over my state of overwhelm time and time again. Power through, doing my best until June, and then collapse.
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As a kid, the level of tolerance I had for discomfort was immense. I accepted a lot of bad behaviour from peers and adults, assuming that life just “felt this way”.
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Later on, when I started learning more about personal development and spirituality, I noticed that the way I’d always operated in the world felt... painful.
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Suddenly everything hurt.
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Relationships bristled like a wool scarf, tied too tight.
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Work events that were previously just “boring” filled me with existential rage.
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I felt like I was losing my mind.
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Turns out, it was growing pains.
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For so many years, my spiritual thermostat was way low.
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Once I started inching towards alignment with my soul, I couldn’t believe how uncomfortable I had been, for so many years.
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If you’ve recently embarked on a similar journey, know this:
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One of the biggest indicators of spiritual growth is discomfort.
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If you find yourself suddenly feeling crummy?
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It’s working.
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Give your heart time to adjust to the temperature of your soul.
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As Mary Oliver writes, “let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.”
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Go easy on yourself.
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And keep learning more whenever you’re ready.